Phoenix, Arizona Alcoholic Anonymous: The Tenth Step Promise

(Working the Step)

This thought brings us to Step Ten, which suggests we continue to take personal inventory and continue to set right any new mistakes as we go along. We vigorously commenced this way of living as we cleaned up the past. We have entered the world of the Spirit. Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime. Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them. We discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. Then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help. Love and tolerance of others is our code.

(The 10th step Promise)

And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone, even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned. We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.

(A disclosure, though)

It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God's will into all of our activities. "How can I best serve Thee, Thy will (not mine) be done." These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will.

Do you want to be placed in a position of neutrality, safe and protected? Visit Crossroads, Inc.

Crossroads, Inc. is a non-profit, drug and alcohol recovery, organization located in beautiful Phoenix, Arizona. Crossroads is a Level Four transitional facility licensed by the State of Arizona. The Crossroads program addresses the physical, emotional and spiritual aspects of alcoholism or drug addiction, by providing food, shelter, 12 step structure and discipline. We can help you find direction to sober living. Pick up the phone and call us: 602-279-2585. Visit our website at: http://sober360.com

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The holidays are approaching and we all think of good cheer, but for many people the holidays are a very difficult time. We rarely think about how many of our holiday traditions involve alcohol and excess. How can we make the holidays safer for everyone and more enjoyable for our friends in recovery?

When you are planning a party, always be sure to have non-alcoholic drinks available and easy to access. It can be just as festive to have non-alcoholic eggnog and other seasonal drinks. If you have not eliminated alcohol from your party be sure that you have alternative ways to get guests home. Designated drivers, taxis or overnight accommodations are all ways to keep everyone safe. Alcohol-related motor vehicle crashes kill someone every 31 minutes and non-fatally injure someone every two minutes. Approximately 1.5 million drivers were arrested in 2002 for driving under the influence of alcohol or narcotics. This is an arrest rate of 1 for every 130 licensed drivers in the United States. (NHTSA 2004) Be cautious; do not think it could not happen to you. According to the National Commission Against Drunk Driving, between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Day as many as 2,000 people are killed in traffic accidents nationwide.

Holidays are a time when we want to have our children and teenagers enjoy the season, but the most importantly, we want to be sure they are safe. Don’t be afraid to talk openly with your teens and young adults about the dangers of alcohol, drugs and peer pressure. Let them know about the increase in high risk behavior during the holiday break when they have so much more free time. Remember that your own behavior is the best model for you children of any age.

The holidays can be a difficult time for many people. They can be overwhelmed with financial issues, family and shopping demands. They may feel a great deal of loneliness, stress and isolation during the season. This is especially true for anyone who is in recovery at this time of the year. They need to be sure to attend extra meetings or put in place extra supports. Everyone needs to be sure to manage their time, learn how to say no, and reflect on the meaning of the holiday. Alcohol may make us feel better for a while but it is a depressant and will only create more problems.

It is important to remember that the holidays can be very difficult for families who have members with substance abuse problems. Don’t wait for a crisis, seek help and support now. The holidays can be a troubled time in these families, but sometimes the person with the problem has hit their bottom around the holidays and is more open to seeking help. There is help available if you or someone in your family is struggling. Center for Addictive Diseases can assist you to find the right treatment or support group for you and your family members. Exton and Drexel Hill offices of CAD all wish you a happy and safe holiday season.

Crossroads, Inc. is a non-profit, drug and alcohol recovery, organization located in beautiful Phoenix, Arizona. Crossroads is a Level Four transitional facility licensed by the State of Arizona. The Crossroads program addresses the physical, emotional and spiritual aspects of alcoholism or drug addiction, by providing food, shelter, 12 step structure and discipline. We can help you find direction to sober living. Pick up the phone and call us: 602-279-2585. Visit our website at: http://sober360.com

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Patricia used to approach the holidays with an overwhelming sense of dread, because she never knew what her alcoholic brother might do to ruin them. As Thanksgiving floral arrangements gave way to sparkling Christmas ornaments and the drone of holiday music, her stomach would clench more each day and her mood would grow darker.

"Some years were just awful," she recalls. "So often my brother would show up drunk and make a scene at family gatherings. He'd scare his kids, embarrass his wife, and break my mother's heart over and over again. One year he got arrested a week before Christmas for driving under the influence and for disorderly conduct. I remember that we called the judge to ask if they could keep him in jail until after the holidays. We all breathed a collective sigh of relief when they did just that. We could finally relax and enjoy ourselves, knowing he was safe but unable to spoil things for everyone."

Thankfully, those painful memories are distant ones now, because Patricia's brother--after 25 years as a practicing alcoholic--stopped drinking 20 years ago. "But it took me several years after he went into treatment to trust him and his recovery," she says. "For a long time, I still prepared myself for the worst, half expecting another midnight phone call saying he had been an accident."

The holiday scene Patricia describes today, however, is right out of a Norman Rockwell painting. "My brother is a grandfather now, and he is like an excited little boy, eagerly watching his grandkids open the gifts he laboriously and lovingly picked out for each of them. I'm so grateful that my parents got to experience his sobriety and witness the profound changes he made in his life before they died."

Patricia says her own involvement in the Twelve Step program of Al-Anon has helped her understand that addiction is truly a disease that affects the entire family. She says recovery has allowed her to unearth the meaning of the holiday season and reclaim them as the joyous and contemplative occasions they were meant to be.

In autumn, the early settlers of our country gathered and evaluated their harvest, preparing themselves for the challenging winter months ahead as they gave thanks for the bounty their hard work brought them. "This is how I view Twelve Step recovery and Thanksgiving now," Patricia says. "I welcome it as a time to take stock of past experiences and meditate on the lessons I've learned--seeing those lessons as my 'harvest,' my protection for any future difficulties. Then I find ways to express my gratitude for all I've been given."

Two years after her brother began recovery, for example, Patricia gave him a little music box for Thanksgiving that played "We've Only Just Begun," thanking him for rekindling the flame of family that was almost extinguished in the winds of his alcoholism.

Patricia describes herself as a spiritual person who sees Christmas as another opportunity for deep reflection. "To me, Christmas is about love, acceptance and expectancy--a symbol of birth and hope," she says. "I try to carry through with the 'attitude of gratitude' that I learned about in Twelve Step recovery, and use Christmas as a time to help others."

Some years she and her husband and daughter play "secret Santa" and buy gifts for a family in need. Sometimes they serve meals at a homeless shelter or take an elderly friend out for a holiday lunch. She also likes to write letters of appreciation at Christmas to the special people in her life, letting them know what gifts they are to her.

"Recovery has been transformative for me, for my brother, and for my whole family," she says. "Twenty years ago, I hated the holidays and feared what my brother would do. But then he sobered up and I got my big brother back. Along the way, I discovered the Twelve Steps. I guess miracles really do happen. Isn't that what the holidays are all about?"

Crossroads, Inc. is a non-profit, drug and alcohol recovery, organization located in beautiful Phoenix, Arizona. Crossroads is a Level Four transitional facility licensed by the State of Arizona. The Crossroads program addresses the physical, emotional and spiritual aspects of alcoholism or drug addiction, by providing food, shelter, 12 step structure and discipline. We can help you find direction to sober living. Pick up the phone and call us: 602-279-2585. Visit our website at: http://sober360.com